communication in marriage: rapport

communication in marriage: rapport:

Being in rapport is one of the most powerful states you can be in. When you met, you were in massive chemical rapport. Remember the first words you shared, asking for the first date, the first kiss, the first everything. That yummy togetherness is rapport? You can rekindle the old rapport with practice as well as enhance your present relationship by actively being in rapport. Once again, you can choose to be in ACTIVE love or Passive Love. You can use this in sales and business too. In fact in any relationship you value. The real professionals even use body language mirroring and other techniques to enhance this.

Here are some examples.

Partner 1

Hey darling it’s so nice to see you

Not in Rapport

Partner 2

The gem squash at PicknPay is R7/kg at the moment

 

 

 

Partner 1

Hey darling it’s so nice to see you

In Rapport

Partner 2

Thank you. Yes. Isn’t it lovely to be together like this?

 

Partner 1

How wonderful that the DA did so well!

Not in Rapport

Partner 2

It did not do well. The ANC did well.

 

 

 

Partner 1

How wonderful that the DA did so well!

In Rapport

Partner 2

They did very well all things considered. I just wish they had done better

 

Partner 1

Hello sweetheart, I made dinner

Not in Rapport

Partner 2

Yes I can see that. The kitchen is a mess.

 

 

 

Partner 1

Hello sweetheart, I made dinner

In Rapport

Partner 2

Awesome. Thank you. I am starving. Let’s eat and then I’ll help you tidy up.

 

Partner 1

I am having such an issue with my boss

Not in Rapport

Partner 2

You should be more assertive with him

 

 

 

Partner 1

I am having such an issue with my boss

In Rapport

Partner 2

Aish. It’s horrible to be unhappy at work. Shout if you need some assistance *hug and kiss on forehead*

 

I suggest you take turns reading the above to each other a couple of times. You read “partner 1” and your partner replies with “partner 2”. Feel what it feels like when you are not in rapport. Now create your own examples below.

Partner 1

 

Not in Rapport

Partner 2

 

 

 

 

Partner 1

 

In Rapport

Partner 2

 

 

Partner 1

 

Not in Rapport

Partner 2

 

 

 

 

Partner 1

 

In Rapport

Partner 2

 

 

This is an excerpt from the book, “So you’re married, now what?

Written by the marriage expert, Stephen van Basten

www.stephenvanbasten.co.za/author.html

Advertisements

About Stephen van Basten - The Marriage Expert

When you meet Stephen van Basten you instantly realize that there is more to him than meets the eye. This is not a moment to judge a book by its cover. Stephen boasts a list of achievements: He met his wife, Jacqui, 27 years ago, married her 21 years ago and is the proud father of a 'very together' 18 year old daughter. Stephen will immediately tell you with a twinkle in his eye, that Life, Work, Marriage and Parenthood are not for sissies. That while they are all hard work, they can be, and should be, incredibly rewarding and fulfilling. Stephen is a past Karate World Champion, a yoga enthusiast and recovering golfer. If you opened Trip Advisor on his facebook page you will see that he has visited 81 cities in 52 countries including the USA, Alaska, Japan, Europe, Australia and China. Stephen has owned his own company, worked in his family's business, being employed by small and large businesses like Shell SA and the BTG Group. His titles include Brand Manager, Sales Manager, Account Manager, Sales Representative and Business Owner. He now sees himself as an Author, Speaker, Trainer and Coach. Stephen published his first book, "So you're engaged, now what? The journey from engaged to married" in December 2013. His ingenious marketing strategy put this book into over 2000 hands in its first 6 months. His second book "So you're alive, now what? The journey from birth to death" is available online and he is working on 5 more books in the series including "So you're married, now what?". Stephen's obvious passion and first love is Human Behavior and specifically Human Behavior as it manifests in RELATIONSHIPS. He is quick to point out that we have many differing relationships: employer, employees, customers, suppliers, colleagues, friendships, marriage, parents, siblings, children, our maker, other drivers on the roads and we generally have issues in most if not all of them. Stephen is a student of the well-known human behavior specialist, Dr. John Demartini and is constantly researching and honing his understanding of this incredibly complex subject. In 2013 he completed over 175 hours of intense training on T. Harv Eker's signature courses.
This entry was posted in Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s